I'm an hour away from the end of my shift....My mind is all over the place... I wouldn't say that I'm anxious...but I'm a bit panicky and feeling irritable...This morning I felt fine, grounded within myself...but as the day unfolds, I'm watching myself try to keep it together although it currently seems like nothing is happening the way that I'm asking for it to...
D E E P A S S B E L L Y B R E A T H
It feels like the sky is fucking falling right now, and it's not because of any one particular thing...
D E E P A S S B E L L Y B R E A T H
I'm in transition and although I am consciously aware of this... This re-birthing cycle is really pulling all of my muhfucking cards... and in the midst of typing this, I'm being tried smh...fucking professionalism and maturity my ass... I'm over the "bigger person" trope.... but i digress
D E E P A S S B E L L Y B R E A T H
"The sky is falling...ain't no need to panic..." is my one of my favorite OutKast lyrics... from one of my favorite songs... and right now, it's what I'm singing inside while reminding myself to take a
D E E P A S S B E L L Y B R E A T H
See... I'm at the part of my story where I've stormed away from "everything that didn't serve me," but my surroundings look like a barren landscape, and I feel sad about it. I feel sad that my efforts aren't producing immediate results. I feel sad that I feel sad about something that was so necessary. I feel mad that I'm so hard on myself. I feel mad that everything that worked for me before may no longer be what will work for me now....
D E E P A S S B E L L Y B R E A T H
D E E P A S S B E L L Y B R E A T H
D E E P A S S B E L L Y B R E A T H
D E E P A S S B E L L Y B R E A T H
D E E P A S S B E L L Y B R E A T H
These breaths...these mindfulness moments...they are saving grace... There's a lot of science about how deep breathing improves circulation, brain function, and consequently stress relief... I won't go into that right now...This is just for reminding us all that transitions are a part of the journey, and that all of these feelings are temporary. A year from now, I'll read my journal entries and blog posts with a smile and sacred twerk.
Take care of yourselves!
Love,
Candice