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welcome to another rebirthing cycle

Last week, I posted a reflection about learning how to create a life that allows me to divest from

capitalistic/consumer-driven practices...

Some questions that I am exploring are: How do I make a living without commodifying myself or perpetuating harm? How do I generate income without sacrificing my body, mind, and/or energy? (having worked in retail for fifteen years, I am still unpacking all of the ways in which I internalized and participated in the psychological madness).

Even now, I feel uncomfortable (guilty/gross) trying to "do business." I'm not interested in "branding" or "monetizing my passions." When I filed for my LLC a few years ago, that was the path that I was on. I offered hair and makeup services, education, readings, crystals, and oils. But after some time, I realized that capitalism/consumerism had perverted the essence of these practices and knowledge. That meditation and wellness aren't to be sold. That the earth's minerals aren't meant to be pillaged by us. That my oils, although beautifully crafted, are not meant to be worn by everybody or even everyday.

I don't want to sell knowledge, but I want to value my time and experience. I enjoy teaching and doing makeup, but not at the expense of aligning with harmful standards and systems. I want to be well-compensated, but I know that I need to reframe what value and compensation look like to me. It is a lot to unpack, but I know that it will be more than worth it.

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